Dear Mouse,
For the last four days, I have been meeting
with some former classmates. I requested
some friends to take care of my blog as
I reminisced the good old days with old
friends.
I got an idea from pinay/expat
when she let her JP did the blogging for her.
Meet my guest bloggers. They are willing to answer your questions.
The Ca t
huh?thanks but no thanks. Ask mom.leave us alone.
Okay,shoot.Us gorillas are smarter than humans.tssk tssk
Doc Emer
got some questions:
Doc Emer: Did you know that 2 men die for
every woman during the years between adolescence
and adulthood?
Mom Gorilla: So ?
(Canned applause for a very enlightening response).
Doc Emer: In the US men had higher death rates than
women for all 11 leading causes of death. The biggest
differences between male and female mortality rates
were for suicides, homicides, nonautomobile accidents
and autombile accidents.
Mom Gorilla : Doc,I can offer you causes of suicides.
mother-in-law, not the meddling in-law types but those
stay-at-your-home -in -laws whose weather beaten
faces-devoid-of-makeup greet you first hour in the morning
at the kitchen while your wife is still snoring in bed.
You do not want to see the future.
the wifey left. It could have been good riddance if
she did not withdraw your last cent in your joint account.
unpaid bills. yourlucky to have a wife and neighbors
named Joneses.
causes of homicides
your wifey tried the recipe of
radical chef but
used/substituted a wrong ingredient (on purpose perhaps?)
several times, you forgot to check the pockets
for motel receipts, the shirt's collars for lipstick
marks(your wife is allergic of lip gloss)and you talk
during sleep.
you overslept in your mistress' home
your gambling debts give your creditors
heartburn
causes of automobile accidents
your wife volunteered to drive that reduced
you to a backseat driver
you eluded the cop that could have asked
you to take the breath analyer test
you thought that your speed should be
equal to your normal diastolic.
Non-autombile accidents
You are fond of lechon and other
fatty foods. You think that your wife
is just a nagger when she reprimands you.
Beating the red light
by crossing the street when the traffic
light is already red saves you precious
minutes but won't save your life.
whoever copies this blog without
the guest bloggers'permission.Pick your
weapon.
7 Comments:
I had another good laugh reading this, Cath. Thanks for relieving me of my daily stress. =)
Hay, I second the motion, Doc Emer. Cathy, ikaw ang antidote ko sa mga bwisit sa blog ko.
Hmmm, pag especially bitchy ako, si Batjay binabasa ko. ;)
Moving on does not mean going to the last destination.
There are levels of progression of the souls. The earthbound spirits may have moved on but they might not have crossed over yet where there is no more point of return.
I got more stories more about these topics but
am busy until my friends leave this weekend.
mayron akong kumara na talagang inspector ng mga gamit ng asawa niya. she checks my kumpare's collars for lipstick, amoy ng t-shirt kung amoy pabango ng babae. check ng leeg kung mag chikinini. check ng wallet kung may mga questionable na resibo at condom na hindi gamit. she also smells her husbands used underwear if it has the smell of sex. i shit you not.
tawag nga namin sa kanya ay "jawo".
kumara = kumare.
buyoyong ko talaga. kakasigarillo ng hope nung araw.
jay,
preho lang tayo.tingnan mo yong comment ko para sa kabila dito nakapost. boyoyongdinako.
cat, kakatawa to. Pero yung unang-una about the mother-in-law, parang di nakakatawa. Nakakaiyak. Sabagay di naman nakikialam biyenan ko kahit samin siya nakatira. Nakakatulong pa nga, kaya lang daldal ng daldal. Lam mo yun? Kahit walang kausap, ipinaglihi yata sa sama ng loob. hehehe
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