Tuesday, March 04, 2003

RELIVING THE PAST Coffee Cups and Cat Counting FAST I am not using a BUG today. I will just sit and watch the humans converse. I don’t care asking for strudel or cappuccino. I am full. One mouse went to heaven today. Burrrp. As bagwis would put it, I will have the look of a cat that has just swallowed a canary. Another burp. Len: It's amazing how we can still vividly remember seemingly insignificant events in our life. I suppose they were the ones that made an impact on our young minds. (Cat notes: Cup one, one doughnut). Wander: We somehow have heavy emotional attachments on experiences or events in our lives that we tend to bury….mostly, they are the beautiful ones that always leave us nostalgic feelings. (Cat notes: Cup one, one strudel) Len: Hmmm, I have experiences that hurt me so much I still can't talk about them. They have become the bases of how I react to certain situations, ...... the walls to protect me from getting hurt. (Cat notes: Refill one, another doughnut). Wander: The seemingly insignificant events are easily discussed and even the most hurting experience can be therapeutic when retold. (Cat notes: Refill one, another strudel). Len: To talk about them is never therapeutic to me. I'm not like a computer where things can be deleted and forgotten. I never forget, and so is the person who is the cause of hurt. (Cat notes: Refill two, another doughnut). Edgarbb: I'm with you, ol' buddy, partly. There ARE some experiences that are just so traumatic that it's seared into the soul forever, and we'll carry it to the grave. It's there inside, dormant, festering perhaps, half-forgotten maybe, but still there. But if one's fortunate, there comes a time- a convergence of events, a confluence of the stars if you will- the right person whom you trust, the right emotional ambience, the right spiritual connection- and all of a sudden, BOOM! (Cat notes: First mug of coffee, one pan de sal.) Wander: I agree with you on this one Edgar however, let me tell you though that what is mostly devastating which we may find more unendurable is to get the wrong person to trust. (Cat notes:Refill three no more strudel, get one pandesal from Edgarbb) Edgarbb: ... You know you have got to get it out and share- and now! Mind you, not just anybody will do, and not all the time. When to share? Quien sabe- who knows??? Your persona, your psyche will know, as it'll just come rushing out of the innermost depth of your soul where it's been hidden for so long. And after the sharing, the airing, the communion, it goes back inside, still unforgotten of course, but having been aired and shared, you feel much better, at peace with the world. It was therapeutic- retold once, yes. But not again- not evermore, again. Trust me on this one. I'd been there. (Cat notes :Second mug of coffee, another pan desal. Hides the rest of pandesal from Wander. Stands up and stretches the hands upward like the UP Oblation .Cat remembers Bagwis and the meatus stuff)hehehe Wander : As it turns in many cases, the hurtful traumatic past may become an open public issue which drive others in committing their instant death. (Cat notes: Refill four, gets one doughnut from Len. ) Len: Scars will always be there as a reminder but one has changing acceptance each time you look at it depending on how our rationalization is influenced by the seasons of time. There are so many things that happened and did in my life that I wish I had done differently, but every time I look at the present, all regrets that I have disappear. (Cat notes: Refill 3, two doughnuts. The cat makes hypotheses. There is no significant relationship between the pace of women's talking and eating. There is no significant relationship between the pace of women's talking and men's eating.) Len: Every turn you make affects the future. Had I not attended so many protests in the streets and missed so many classes, I could have maintained my average and could have gone on to become a doctor. Who knows what my life would be now. Maybe I wouldn't even be here in the States, So I changed courses and met my husband. Do I regret not becoming a doctor ? No. I hate hospitals (Cat notes: Refill 4 three doughnuts. Conclusion. Hypothesis 1. Null and Void. 1. The faster and longer the talk, the more doughnuts in peril.) Len: It is when the hurt remains that is the problem.... in other words, not letting go. But as we grow older, it is heartening to relive the past with no regrets, keep those memories that warm our hearts, count our blessings in the present, and look forward w/ great anticipation to the future. (Cat notes: Refill 5. NO more doughnuts. Edgar and Wanderlust ate the rest while she is busy talking. Hypothesis 2 Null and Void. The faster the women talk, the faster the men eat. Hmmmm Quotation for the day: You cannot change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying the future.


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