Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Liar, Liar, Liar

Dear mouse,

So what did I tell you. The Pope is no longer running the Catholic Church as claimed by some spokesperson of the Vatican City.

So who is the caretaker or caretakers?

Ailing Pope is no longer actively running Catholic Church, spokesman indicates

The Vatican indicated for the first time yesterday that Pope John Paul was no longer actively running the Catholic Church. In a statement announcing that the ailing pontiff was now being fed through a tube in his nose, his spokesman said merely that the pontiff was "following" the church's activities.

The latest disclosure about the Pope's treatment came shortly after he had again tried and failed to speak in public. His spokesman, Joaquín Navarro Valls, made clear that the leader of the world's biggest Christian denomination is, for the moment at least, an invalid who spends "many hours" in an armchair.

Hmphhh

The Ca t

Special Delivery-Bride

Dear mouse,

Seryoso ako. Nang mabasa ko ang blog ni Manangku ay nag-isip muna ako, binasa ang forum kung saan ang suliranin ng isang Pinay na kasal sa Puti ay inutakan ng asawa upang hindi siya maging legal na residente ng Estados Unidos.

Magaling ang blueprint, lahat pinag-isipan.

Parang kagaya rin ng nangyari sa isang taga Bicol na ang anak ay nakuha ng asawang British at nailayo sa kaniya, (mayroon akong isang istorya nito sa aking archive;parang katulad ng isang pinay na pinakasalan din ng isang Australiano na pagkatapos magamit, pinagbakasyon sa Pilipinas matapos bigyan ng one-way ticket. Ang address na ibinigay ay P.O.Box.

Karamihang nabibiktima nito ay ang mga mababa ang pinag-aralan na hindi nila alam ang kanilang mga karapatan at nagiging sunud-sunuran sa kanilang mga napapangasawang ibang lahi. Hindi ho naman ibig sabihin nito na masasama na ang mga lalaking hindi natin kalahi.

Kung kayo ay pupunta kay Manangku,mababasa ninyo ang buong kuwento pati na ang mga documentong kanilang nalikom para sa ebidensiya.

Ang kaniyang tanging pag-asa na lang niya ay isang organisasyong katulad ng Gabriela para mabawi ang kaniyang anak.

Ang mga tanong nga ay bakit hindi nilegalize ng asawang Puti ang kaniyang pagtira ng mahigit 7 taon sa USA?

Bakit tinuring lang siyang empleyado at hindi asawa na may karapatan sa kanilang ari-arian?

Paano siya naideborsiyo ng siya ay pagbakasyunin sa Pilipinas kahit wala pa siyang papel na masasabing may karapatan na siyang tumira sa Estados Unidos?

Paano niya mababawi ang kaniyang anak na bukod sa ang custody ay nakuha ng kaniyang asawa dahil inilabas nga na inabandona niya at hind na siya makita dito sa Pinas?

Obvious bang ginamit lang siya? Huwag na ninyo akong sagutin.

Malupit ang mga tao.

Sana at may tumulong kay Merlita.

The Ca t

In this Corner eheste Korni- r

Dear mouse,

They find my site thru google. I am referring to the searchers. Lately, the build-up of traffic is contributed by the search for short Tagalog poems. Most of the poems, I published were long ones, even the tanaga.

So I decided to write a one stanza-tanaga.


tulang ito’y maiksi,

wala pang isang dali,

ito ‘y aking hinabi,

aking labi’y may ngiti

tanaga...hihihi

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Pero ito ang pinakamaiksing tula.

Ikaw

...............

...............

...............

...............

Now, what ?

Di ba maiksi.

In this corner, korniko.

*sampal sampal sa sarili.*

The Ca t

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Si Pinay at ang Gerl Pren

Dear mouse,

Ito itutuloy ng pinaysaamerika.

Niyaya ako ng kaibigan kong pumunta sa remittance company.para makapagpadala siya ng 500 dollars. Ganyan siya magmahal sa boypren niya.Tinanong ko kung sigurado siya. Oo raw. Doon daw siya masaya.

Hige.

Sa isip ko, kung kaharap ko ang boypren niya, bibigyan ko siya ng left hook AT RIGHT HOOK, TUTUHURIN KO SIYA SA BABA NG KANYANG SINTURERA. AT PAGNAKALUGMOK NA SIYA AY SAKA KO ITATAPON ANG PERA SA KANIYANG MUKHA, sabay ang sabi ng...

More...

The Ca t

BABABA BA ?

Dear mouse,

Frat a regular commenter in my blog wrote:

Like I remember in a big hospital which has plenty of pinay nurses. on the 12th floor two american doctors got into the elevator, then on the 10th floor, three pinas nurses got in. standing infront of the elevator, then the elevator opened up on the 9th floor...then three pinay nurses standing outside the elevator asked the pinay nurses inside: BABABA BA? so the pinay inside the elevator replied ...BABABA. on the 7th floor the same thing happened.. the pinay nurses outside the elevator asked those inside.. BABABA BA? the same reply...BABABA. then on the 6th floor all of the pinay nurses althoger walked out of the elevator leaving the two American doctors inside. then the two faced each other and one of them said: GOD DAMM...THEY ALL TALKED LIKE SHEEPS AND THEY UNDERSTOOD EACH OTHER.

What these foreign doctors do not know is that we do not have to emote or to make a lot of gestures like they do in order to communicate...that a one syllable- word can express a sentiment, an affirmation or a rejection by merely repeating it once or twice.

Here is a poem that would describe what the Ca t is meowing about.

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Bababa ba ?

Bababa ka ba sa ibaba ?

Bababa ka ba nang nakatingala ?

Bababa lahat pag ikaw ay nadapa.

Bababa naman ang kilay ko sa kaliwa.

Lalala ba ang iyong problema ?

Lalala ba kung wala ka ng pera ?

Lalala nga iyong kung ikaw ay tatanga,

Lalala lalo kung wala kang maisip magawa.

Yayaya ka ba ng mga kaibigan,

Yayaya ka ba sa munting kasalan,

Yayaya ka ba kahit ayaw ng magulang,

Yayaya ka ba kahit ang iyong pera at kulang?

Ooo ka ba pag ikaw tinanong,

Ooo ka ba pag pari ay bumulong,

Ooo ka ba pag sinabing walang uurong,

Ooo ka ba sa mga tanong nang walang linggatong.

Nganganga ka ba pag ikaw sumigaw,

Nganganga ka ba kahit na makabulahaw,

Nganganga ka ba para bibig ay lumuwang,

Nganganga ka ba kahit pumasok ang langaw ?

Popopo ka ba saiyong mga biyenan,

Popopo ka ba bilang pagbigay galang,

Popopo ka ba pag ikaw ay di tinantanan,

Popopo ka pa rin kaya pag saiyo sila pumisan ?

Bobobo ka ba pag ikaw nabagok

bobobo ka ba pag ikaw sinuntok,

Bobobo ka ba pag ikaw ay binugbog,

bobobo ka nga pag ikaw ay tutulog -tulog.

Ngongongo ka ba kahit walang sipon,

Ngongongo ka ba pag sagot labas ilong,

Ngongongo ka ba pag hindi ka sangayon,

Ngongongo ka ba kung ang sagot ay lahat lang ungol.

poem by one makulit.

The Ca t

Monday, March 28, 2005

Si Pinay at ang voice tape

Dear mouse,

My other side,Pinaysaamerika is also contributing to my traffic even though it is not updated regularly.

Here is an update.

(Ang mga salaysay po rito ay nakaraan at hindi ang aking pangkasulukyan. Kung baga ay balik-tanaw na walang contact lens).

Wala kaming pasok pareho ng aking kaibigan kaya tambay ako sa kaniyang kuwarto. Inabutan ko siyang nakikinig ng voice tape. Galing sa kaniyang boy pren sa Pinas Ang kaibigan ko ay diborsyada sa asawa niyang Puti na siyang nagpetition sa kaniya papunta rito sa Estet. Natuklasan ng Puti na nakikipag-communicate pa rin siya sa boypren niya sa Pinas. Mabait si Puti at mabuting tao rin ang aking kaibigan. Iba-iba nga lang ang kanilang minamahal. Parang kanta ni Sharon, Mahal kita, mahal mo siya, mahal niya ay iba. Ayaw lang ni Puti na makitang kinukuwartahan ng boy pren ang aking kaibigan na hindi ko pa kaibigan noon. Ewan ko ang gulo talaga ng buhay.

Kadidibrosiyo lang nila nang kmai ay magkakilala. Balikan sila ng boypren sa Pinas. Sulat,telepono, at voice tape. Pakinggan natin.

Voice tape: Honey, alam mo namang ikaw lang ang mahal ko at yan ay di magbabago.

Honey niya: Sarap pakinggan.

Ako: (Bulong lang ho) Sarap sapukin. Lokohin mo lelang mo. Ewan ko ba, sense ko na bolero talaga yong boy pren na yon.

>More...

The Ca t

Sunday, March 27, 2005

Google Adsense

Dear mouse,

If you have google ads in your webpage, this news report may interest you.

Suits may dent Google ads - report

By Alistair Barr, MarketWatch

Update: 7:32 PM ET March 27, 2005

A growing number of lawsuits against Google Inc. may dent the Internet search giant's revenue, the International Herald Tribune newspaper reported Sunday.

The lawsuits challenge Google's practice of selling online keyword advertisements to the rivals of companies that own trademarks covering those words, the newspaper explained. So-called keyword advertising is a main source of revenue for Google (GOOG: news, chart, profile) , which generated $3.2 billion in sales last year largely by charging a few cents each time a user clicks on an ad, the newspaper said.

The Ca t sez: And I am beginning to earn a few dollars. Hmph

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The Ca t

The World according to the Berks

Dear mouse,

In case some of you are curious, the members of the berks have varied professions. we got a doctor, a lawyer, engineers, teachers, photographer/IT specialists,director/writer, poets, professional writers, businesswoman and a Ca t.

(Syempri).

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We have nothing in common except sense of humor, right or wrong, right or left, right or right, whatever. Here is a sample where a simple sentence that is meant to inform can become a full blown script of gags.

The Ca t : may sakit si yuga.

LOLO JOSE: anong sakit nya? trangkaso or typhoid? parehong uso yan ngayon dito.

ZENNOR: Di ba yung typhoid yung lumalaki ang leeg ?

TATANG ROME: Thyroid yun . he he he, kakatwa ka…. Typhoid, di ba yun yung malakas na ulan?

APO GADANG: typhoon yun tatang. hahaha

SASSY LAWYER: thyphoid yung parang nakuryente buhok di ba? tapos nagiging sinto-sinto… balita ko si apo gadang at si batjay tig-3 beses na t inamaan nyan…

APO GADANG: HOOOY! hindi tatlong beses ha. dalawa’t kalahati lang. muntik lang yung last.

BONGK: hehehehe tipos lang yon hehehehe

THE Ca T: hindi na ba talaga titino ang usapan ninyo. Thypoid - yong error. past tense. typo d

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The Ca t

Holy Week Blues

Dear mouse,

Kami pong blogkadahan ay nag-obserba rin ng Holy Week. Makabagbag damadamin ang aming mga usapan tungkol sa kultura ng Pilipino pag sumasapit ang kuwaresma.

Ito ay dagdag kaaalaman at puno ng mga tunay na pangyayari. Silipin po ninyo ang aming usapan tungkol sa holy week sa blogkadahan. Ito po ang sampol.

APO GADANG: mari, madali lang ang problema mo. pilit mong painumin ng castor oil. hindi na papasok yun.

BATJAY: ipako mo sa krus.

BONGK: speaking of “ipako sa krus” - may napanood akong sinakulo noon sa may Cainta, yung kristo na nakapako natanggal yung pagkakatali sa isang kamay kaya umulaod sya pababa paharap kay virgin mary at si john, grabe tawanan ang mga tao… tapos yung naman nag ki-kristo sa may pasig, yung nagbubuhat ng krus biglang tumigil sa paglalakad tapos nagsalita “tanginang cellphone to oo kitam nag bubuhat ng krus text nt text” sabay kuha sa cellphone nya sa bulsa at nag text.. hiyawan ang mga tao heheheheheh.

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Akala ninyo nakakatawa yan, syempre hindi patatalo ang isa...

APO GADANG: La yan dun sa kwento dito sa Muntinglupa. May Senakulo. Yung ...

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The Ca t

Almost An Angel

Dear mouse,

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Ang Pista ng Pagkabuhay sa atin ay nagsisimula sa SALUBONG.Sa mga batang lumaki na ang kahulugan ng Easter ay kuneho at itlog na makukulay, sa Pinas ay ipinagdiriwang ito sa pamamagitan ng prusisyon kung saan ang Birheng Maria ay masasalubong si Hesus na bagong buhay mula sa pagkakalibing ng Biyernes Santo.

Dito ay kailangan ng mga batang anghel upang magsaboy ng bulaklak at umawit habang ang pinakabidang anghel ay unti-unting bumababa galing sa itaas upang alisin ang nakatalukbong sa imahen ng Kristong Nabuhay.

Ang aking ina ay dakilang stage mader. Gusto niyang kasama kami sa mga activities sa iskul at sa simbahan. Kaya nang malaman niyang kailangan ng aming parish ang mga batang babae para maging anghel sa Araw ng Pagkabuhay, namber wan ang pangalan ko sa listahan.

Dahil bawal daw ang manahi ng Huwebes at Biyernes Santo, Sabado niya inasikaso ang aking gagamitin sa aking pag-aanghel. Gulo ang sambahayanan sa pag-asikaso.

Para sa puting damit kong gagamitin, tinahi ng aking mader ang natirang pirasong lace mula sa kurtinang tinahi noong nakaraang pista. Huwag lamang akong tatabi sa bintana at baka ako ay mapagkakamalang napunit na piraso, maganda ang mahabang damit na tinahi niya para sa akin.

Hitsurang dinaanan ng malaking labaha ang mga puting manok ng aking lola na napilitang i-donate ang kanilang balahibo sa aking pakpak. Ang aming tanim na gumamela na siyang nagsisilbing bakod ay nakalbo rin ng bulaklak.Nagtitili man ang aming kapitbahay hindi rin siya nakatangging magbigay ng rosal at mga sampagita para sa bulaklak na ilalagay sa aking buhok at sa aking basket.

Ang aking pinsang dalagita ang matiyagang pumigtal ng mga talulot upang punuin ang aking basket sa pamamagitan ng saliw ng kaniyang...He loves me, he loves me not. he loves me.kurot ang inabot niya sa aking tiyang masungit.

Habang abalang ginagawa ang mga ito, ako ay matiyagang nakatanghod. Alas dos na yata ng umaga nila natapos ang lahat. Nakatulog na ako sa tabi.

Alas kuwatro, pupungas pungas akong binihisan, minekapan— mapula raw ang labi ng anghel...at dinala sa simbahan.

Sabi ng namamahala, iwan na raw ako ako doon sa loob at kaming mga anghel ay aayusin ang linya palabas sa lugar kung saan gagawin ang TUNTON. That’s the word for the descent of an angel to remove the piece of cloth that covers the icon of a Jesus Christ Who has just risen.

Siyempre, excited ang mga peyrents at relatives ng mga angeeells na naghitay sa labas.

Kodak dito, kodak doon....kodak dito...kodak doon....

Wala ang angel na pusa. Nakalipad eheste, nakaraan na ang mga angels, wala si pusa.

Dahil maraming tao, matagal bago nila narating ang likod ng altar kung saan nag-aasemble ang mga anghel para hanapin ang munting anghel.

Ahem

Hanap kete, hanap.

Natagpuan din.

Awww

Tulog sa sulok, hawak pa ang basket at natabunan ng pakpak at mga telang ginamit na kapa ng ilang mga kasama sa prusisyon.

Lintek kasing hintay na matapos ang costume. Ang tagal pa ng assembly. Malabo pa ang mata ng in-charge. Kaya si pusa bago dumating ang oras ng prusisyon, nakatulog.

Happy Easter to all.

The Ca t

Saturday, March 26, 2005

Ang Teks Family

Dear Mouse,

"Bawa't hitit mo ng sigarilyo ay di mo naisip na pera kong pinaghirapan ang iyong sinusunog.

ang pagsira mo g iyong buhay ay kagagawan mo na rin at hindi ang aking paghanap ng pambuhay para sa kapakanan ng ating pamilya.

Kung hindi mo ako maigagalang bilang ina, igalang o ako bilang tao.

huhuhu."

Hindi po nagdadrama si Pusa. Dayalog po ni Vilma Santos yon sa pelikulang Anak kung saan si Claudine Baretto na anak niya ay nagwawala sa buhay bilang panggaganti niya sa pagkaiwan sa kanila ni Vilma upang maging DH sa HK.

Ito ang nagiging karaniwang suliranin ng mga OFW na nalayo sa mga anak. Dalawa ang kanilang pinakikibakaan, ang lungkot sa malayong bayan at ang rejection ng mga anak na iniisip ang mga sarili lamang.

Ang kaso sa Anak ay ang walang komunikasyon.

Nahirati ang pamilyang Pilipino na ang suliranin ng pamilya ay sa level lang mag-asawa pinag-uusapan.

Madalas nakakalimutan natin na ang mga bata ngayon ay mas muwang sa mga bata ng mga nakaraang dekada dahil sa pagkakaexpose nila sa mga makabagong teknolohiya.

Isang kaibigan ko ang kababalik lang galing sa Pinas matapos niyang asikasuhin ang pag-ampon sa dalawa niyang pamangkin na pinabayaan na ng kaniyang bayaw sa kanilang pangagalinga mula nang ito ay magkaroon ng ikalwang pamilya. Bago siya tumulak pabalik sa Estet, isang sulat ang nakuha niya sa kaniyang bagahe,mula sa isa sa mga kambal na kaniyang inampon.

Hindi niya akalaing sa murang edad ay alam niya ang sakripisyong ginawa niya para lang sila mabigyan ng magandang kinabukasan.

Nakakaiyak daw ang sulat at mula noon ay hindi niya nakakalimutang magteks sa bata para mapaalam dito na kahit malayo siya ay mas higit pa ang malasakit niya kaysa sa sariling magulang nito.

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Iyan ang bagong kulturang sumibol sa pagdami ng mga magulang o legal guardians na nasa ibang bansa at ang pagbubukas ng komunikasyon upang ang layo ay hindi maging sagabal sa kanilang pagkakaunawaan. Hindi man nito matumbasan ang kaligayahang nadarama kung magkakasama, naiibsan naman ang lungkot at takot dahil sa walang komunikasyon.

Ang bagong pamilyang Pilipino- ang TEKS FAMILY.

The Ca t

Kuwaresma sa Pilipinas

Dear mouse,

Masarap gunitain ang mga nakaraan kahit ang dapat malungkot na araw ng Holy Week.

Ang mga Batang lumaki sa Estet ay walang kamalayan ng ating kultura hatid ng ating pagiging relihiyoso.

1.Ang Pasyon

Ito ay pagbasa ng buhay ni Kristo na nagsisimula sa paglalang ng mundo at ang pagkakasala ni Adan at Eba sa hardin ng Paraiso. Hindi karaniwang pagbasa lang ito ng mga talatang may limang linya at ang huling salita ay nagtapos na may rima.Ito ay binabasa nang pakanta.

Halimbawa

Si Hudas:


Nang matalastas ni Hudas

Ang pagsagot nabanayad

Nilapitan niya agad

Hinagkan nia't niyakap,

Tumatawang parang uslak.

lilindi-linding katawan,

Para rin ng dating asal,

Binati ng buong galang,

Ave Rabbi ang tinuran,

Maestro kong minamahal.

Ang himig ay nasa nagbabasa na lamang. Nagiging itong rock at rap pag ang nagbabasa ay nga kabataan.

Magdamagan ito mula Lunes Santo o kaya ay Domingo de palaspas kaya ang pagkain sa mga nagbabasa ay wala ring hinto, kilala ka man o hindi ng nagpapabasa.

Dito sa parteng ito, masaya, lalo at may ice cream.

2. Ang Penitensiya

Ang pagpepenitensiya ay isang panata.

Ito ay ang paghagupit sa sarili habang naglalakad papunta sa simbahan. Karaniwan na ang tinatakpan ng mga nagpepenitensiya ang kanilang mukha ng isang pirasong tela upang hindi sila makilala. Pagkatapos ng kanilang pagparusa sa sarili, sila ay naliligo sa isang ilog kung saan anila ang kanilang mga sugat at sakit ay kusang napapawi.

Amg Paghugas ng Paa ng mga Apostoles

Pag Huwebes Santo, ang mga piniling mamamayan ay nagsisilbing apostoles sa isang pag-alala ng paghuhugas ng paa bago ginaganap ang Cenaculo. (Last Supper).

3. Prusisyon

Ito ang paglabas ng mga santo at ng imahen ni Hesus sa Santo Sepulcro upang iprusisyon sa bayan. Parang paggunita ito ng paglibing kay Hesus pagkatapos niyang mamatay sa pagkapako sa Krus.

The Ca t

Friday, March 25, 2005

Good Friday

Dear mouse,

I never watched TV on Good Fridays because there was nothing to watch--in the Philippines.

So, Good Friday was practically a quiet day for me.

Here in the States, there were TV channels that show religious-themed movies. This Good Friday, there was none. But I chanced upon documentaries in History Channel that I found interesting---Angels, Good or Evil, The Preserved Saints and the Search for Holy Grail.

1. Angels

The authorities who discussed about angels have Doctorate degrees in Divinity from Harvard University.

They confirmed my belief that sightings that describe these winged creatures dressed in white with ethereal coverings with a message to carry out a mission are already passe.

The angels are depicted in many forms in paintings, sculpture, images and pictures.

I agree with a lady speaker who thought that the messengers of God may appear in human form, whiff of air, bright light and even as a ferocious animal.

One interesting statement of the lady reminded me of a movie of Paul Hogan--Almost an Angel.

She said that human beings have potentials to become angels.

Preserved Saints

I did not know that the "incorruptibles" were subjected to investigation by the scientists and medical doctors.

The "Incorruptibles" were the preserved bodies of people who were canonized by the Catholic Church as saints.

While they found some bodies to have been treated with herbs with embalming properties, many were considered naturally preserved.

With the advancement of techonology and science, the Vatican ruled out uncorrupted bodies from the canonization requirements for fear of hoaxes and artificial preservation.

Holy Grail

The novel of Dan Brown was based on the Bloodline theory of the Holy Grail, that is there is no Cup but instead the Grail represented Mary Magdalene, the female factor in the life of Jesus. There was a theory that with the death of Jesus, Magdalene, pregnant of the son of Jesus fled to Paris and might have produced descendants who now belong to royalty families.

The Ca t

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

Books, books ,books

Dear mouse,

Tatang Rhet of the Karinderia fame would like to know what books, this Ca t is reading.

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All kinds of books excluding the unpublished books authored by the Tyco and Enron executives that sent the authors to jail. They could have been booksellers with the title "How to Cook Corporate Books."

Here are a few questions that he made me answer

1. You're stuck inside Farenheit 451. What book do you want to be?

Life on the Other Side by Sylvia Browne

This is about a psychic's tour of the afterlife. Most of the people would be interested to read what lies ahead out there when they are not among the lucky ones.

Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character?

None.

The last book you bought is...

Can't remember. I haven't started reading what I bought last year which is about How to Enhance Memory.

Five books you would take to a deserted island:

My Agatha Christie collections that include her writings dating as early as 1924 and other detective stories collections. Feel ko detective ako na kailangang malaman ang reason why I was stranded in that deserted island. There must be a conspiracy.

Charles Dickens-wala lang.akala ko kasi noong bata pa ako, nursery rhymes, as in Hickory Dickory...

The whole set of encyclopedia-Wala lang. Feel kong memorize at sumali sa Double Jeopardy pag ako narescue.

How to Deal with Difficult People

I may have problem dealing with my other personalities. Di ba si Tom Hanks nakikipag-away doon sa ball na nilagyan niya ng mukha. Can't remember the title of the movie where he was marooned in an island. bwahahaha

The Bible and the Koran

I like to see the similarities and differences.

What are you currently reading?

Secrets of Tarot

This is my fifth book on Tarots. I may change career anytime. Manghuhula na lang ako. Kukumpetensiyahin ko si Madam Auring. hekhekhek

Driven To Distraction- a book about coping with Attention Deficit Disorder. Don't ask me why.

Strange Stories, AMazing Facts-Wala lang. I love weird stories.Weird people like weird stuff.

Lee Kuan Yew, During the Crucial Years-Wala lang. I like to read about lives of people. Ususera. I finished Mao's,Hillary Clinton's, Mother Teresa's, Martin Luther's, Princess Di's, plain folks and their struggles, movie stars and their rise to fame and fall to oblivion. etc.etc.

The Insanity They Call Love- The love stories of Martin Luther and the nun he married, King Louis and Eleanor of France and love stories in England during Victorian period. Wala lang, I like to know kung gaano sila kacorni pag nainlove.

Much as I want to pass the stick to so many bloggers, I decided not to. They are all on a vacation due to Lenten season.

The Ca t

Tuesday, March 22, 2005

The Angel of Death

Dear mouse,

It's sad news really.

The boy accused of killing nine people in a shooting spree first shot his grandfather and his companion, then donned the man's police-issue gunbelt and bulletproof vest before heading to the high school, where he shot students and teachers at random, authorities said Tuesday. FBI agent Michael Tabman said Jeff Weise appeared to be acting alone in Monday's rampage and the motive was unknown. When it was over, 10 people, including five students and Weise himself, were dead.

His father committed suicide and his mother was brain damaged in an accident.

He is not a normal kid in the block. He admired Hitler, he was drawing people shooting each other.

Even a classmate thought that the drawings of boy-killer made him cringed because he can see the anger inside. This schoolmate was not even a psychologist.

Is he evil ? or just a lost, confused boy?

sad,sad really.

The Ca t

And the Flat Thickens

Dear mouse,

While his physical condition is "fragile," John Paul is "perfectly sound mentally," Cardinal Camillo Ruini, who stood in for the pope on Palm Sunday, said in an interview with the Italian religious affairs weekly magazine Famiglia Cristiana. Ruini said the pope "continues to carry out the acts of government and to assume the major decisions, as he has always done."

Parang nagbabasa ako ng novel.

When the Pope is gone, the Power behind him will have to hand over the governance of that small, very rich and very powerful city/country to the successors. Yes, its plural darling because the power does not rest on the Pope alone. In the meantime, it is said that the Pope despite his illness is appointing new bishops.

Wala lang, type ko lang mag-pantasya ng nobela.

Kung meron silang Dan Brown, ako naman si CA t Black.

Meyowr.

The Ca t

zzzzzzzz

Dear mouse,

Good morning humans.

It's Monday.... whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat, it's Tuesday? Where have I been ?

Ow shucks, I've been with someone who is kalimot to the max that if my mom were alive, she would say... kung hindi nakadaspile iyong... sana ay nawala na...

Wallet...mga marumi isip..Martes Santo pa naman.

Eh ako kalimot din kaya pag nagsama kami o kaya nag-uusap eh bigla kaming mag po-pause at magsasabi ng...Your face is familiar... have we met somewhere

O kaya naman hindi darating at kung dumating ay the following day na at tatanungin pa saiyo... ng oh, do we have an appointment? Oh yeah, I remember, it is 2:00 pm. right? It's only one o' clock...and I am early. Can you imagine that? That's a record.

Parang gusto kong sabunutan ang buhok, itali sa gilid ng kama, sampal-sampalin at ...Oh Yeah, that was 2 o' clock yesterday.

Yong natitirang beads ng rosario ko ay naubos na sa pagdasal na bigyan pa ako ng pasiencia.(yong tinapay).

Kaya pag sinabi niyang he will be in town, wala nang maghihintay sa kanya sa airport.

Palagi niyang namimiss ang flight.

Btw, napansin ba ninyo yong nanay ni Manny Pacquiao na nasa ospital dahil sa pagkatalo ng anak? Ang kapal ng mek-ap niya Deng, at ang pula ng lipstick. Dapat, walang mek-ap kahit lalabas sa TV, noh. nawawala yong paawa effect.

Saka pwede ba tigilan nila ako sa exlusive, exclusive interview nila. Eh lahat nang makita kong media person, kausap si MAnny Pacquiao.

Hmmmmmm

Senga pala, tenk yu sa mga nagcomments sa previous article ko. Hindi ako makasagot at mahirap pumasok...

ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

The Ca t

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Libog mo

Dear mouse,

Whoaaa, before you click that back button, stop and continue reading. I know I shocked you with my title.

As have been mentioned by my fellow berks in their blogsites, the topics that we discussed in the blogkadahan's g-mailslashchatroomslashforum range from the mundane to mundane, from green to greenest jokes and from absurd to most absurd...but one thing that we could credit ourselves, is the encouragement of our Fil-am members to speak and write in Pilipino.

The beauty of it is that we speak different dialects so you could imagine the flurry exchange of e-mails when one insists the meaning of a word from his/her native tongue.

Like, malibog.

In Tagalog, that is horny, but it Bicol, that is labo mo. You're clueless. For water, it is murky.

Like, mahilig siya sa "lagay".

In Tagalog, it is grease money, but in Cebu, it is the man's reproductive organ.

So if you are a voter and a non-Cebuanon- politician promised to "putol the lagay", would you vote for that candidate ? Hmmm?

Like, utot.

In Ilocano,utot is a rat while in Tagalog, it means flatulence.

If Batjay seys, mahilig akong umutot.

It could mean he likes to rat.

Like utong.

In Ilocano, utong is string beans, while in Tagalog, it refers to nipples.

So when an Ilocano asks a non-Ilocano vegetable vendor: Bigyan mo nga ako ng utong, baka masampal pag babae yong sinabihan.hehehe

Like titi.

(hindi ako bastos 'noh).

In Pampanga,titi or tete means bridge while in Tagalog, it means the thing. you know.

So when a Cafamfangan asks you to show him the titi batu...don't slap him.

How about the egss and the birds?

In Pampanga, the egg is already ibun and in Camarines Norte, the penoy is not a duck's egg but a chicken egg.

If you are not entertained by this article, let me sing you a song.

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Sarung banggi,

Sa higdaan,

Nakadanggog ako,

Nin huni

Nin sarong gamgam.

Garo baku,

Katurugan,

Baku kundi, simong boses,

Ika palan.

Translation

Miyawr,miyawrm niyawr, miyarw.

Arayyy,ba't kayo nambabato ng Pusa?

The Ca t

Friday, March 18, 2005

Eat your national heroes daw

Dear mouse,

You must have probably noticed the word "makisawsaw" in my previous article. I used the word before I read this blog of frat, a regular commenter in my NWC.

Read why we eat our national heroes here.

The Ca t

I am not happy

Dear mouse,

Sandali isusuot ko muna ang aking thinking cap. Makikihalo muna ako sa mga intelektuwal na nakikisawsaw sa mga isyu ng ekonomiya at pulitika kahit hindi man marapat.

Tumaas lang ang kilay ko nang magsaya ang pamahalaan dahil nagiging malakas daw ang pesoses sa dolyar. Mula nga naman sa 55 na palitan, bagsak ito sa 53.

Hanggang ngayon nakataas pa rin ang aking kilay. Ayaw bumaba. May tukod.

Kasi alam ko na hindi ang pesoses ang lumakas kung hindi humina ang dolyar. O kakasa kayo?

Ito ang ebidensiya.

US dollar was struggling near a two-month low against the euro on Friday as the market braced for fresh trade data that were likely to show a further widening of the trade gap. As if this weren't trouble enough for the besieged greenback, US Federal Reserve chairman Alan Greenspan stirred up the market Thursday night saying foreign investors would reduce their US asset holdings at some point, while new findings came to light that China is indeed doing so.

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Hmphhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The Ca t

Pers Lab Daw O

Dear mouse,

Maawa na kayo, pakibasa ang kuwento ko dito.

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hehehe

The Ca t

Crispy-Crusted Steak-Diabetic Cooking

Dear mouse,

The fat lady stopped singing at the age of fifty because of diabetes. She was known in the celluloid world as Dabiana.

Unlike other obese movie stars such as Arlene Mulach, and Nadia Montenegro, she was already on the heavy (very heavy side) when she joined the movies.

She was really a candidate for diabetes and other weight-related diseases.

In fact,many people are, if they are not going to watch out for their diet.

Here is one recipe for diabetic diet.

This recipe is for people with diabetes but can also be shared with the other non- diabetic members of the family.

Crispy Crusted Steak

Serving Size: 1 steak 4 servings

Ingredients

1 can (2.8 ounce)French-fried onions coarsely crushed

2 tablespoons olive oil

2 teaspoons spicy brown mustard

4 thinly sliced beef top round steaks

1 pound total

How to:

1. Place the broiler track 8 to 10inches from the heat souece and preheat the broiler. Place the French-fried onions in a shallow dish.

2. In another shallow dish,combine the oil and the mustard. Dip the steaks into the oil mixture, then into the onions,coating completely with each,

3. Place the steaks on a rimmed baking sheet and broil for 3 to 4 minutes per side, or until cooked through.

Calories: 313

Total Fat: 192

Cholesterol

58 mg.

Sodium:259 mg.

Carbohydrate : 9 g.

Protein : 20 g.

Source: AMA booklet on diabetic cooking

The Ca t

Thursday, March 17, 2005

Second round...ting

Dear mouse,

Tapos na ang first round of posts ng 33 members ng blogkadahan na introduction lang ng kanilang mga humble selves.

Ngayon ay ang next topic na pag-uusapan ay about LAB.

Atrebida ho ako noong una dahil nagpost ako ng aking pers lab kuno.

Wala na ho yon at bukas ay bago ang aking post.

Pakibisita ho kami dit0.

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Sa mga interesadong sumali sa magugulong utak ng berks, hintay lang kayo ng mga sampung taon...erase,erase,erase..pinag-uusapan lang ho ang magiging mga sistema pagtanggap ng bagong miyembro, alituntunin,kasi para ba kaming bigla na lang nagbibingo lang tapos nagdecide kaming magtayo ng casino.

Hirap ko siya Reyna Magenta (Ate Sienna) na magbabysit ng dalawang kaharian na kasama ang isang haring "supot" . Oppps, dati raw.

Eh lahat ho gustong maging clown.

Kaya sa susunod si Ca t naman ho ang magiging seryoso.

Sige, nandoon na ho ang unang artikulo.

Bukas na ho ako. Di pa ako nakapagluto ng tinapa.

The Ca t

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Now, what?

it's not your system, folks. for 2 days now, i tried to post and the blogger would not allow me. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The Ca t

Tuesday, March 15, 2005

......????.....????......????

Dear mouse,

God:When religion is founded on hate and fear,the leaders become absolute rulers...

Me: ............

God: and the fundamental law is hate your enemy.

Me:.............

God: When religion is founded on love the leaders become brothers....

Me..............

God: the fundamental law is love your neighbors and enemies.

Me: ...........

God: Cath, Cath, are you listening?

Me: Ow, sorry, GOD, are you talking to me ? (scratches head) I was watching TV. I did not see you coming. Where are the lighnings and thunders ? Where are the angels in the chariot ?

God: That is not funny, Ca t.

Me: I am not trying to be funnny, God. I am really funny even if I try to be serious.

God: I know that you will react again if you see this news:

Muslim religious leaders: It was Allah’s wrath

By John UnsonThe Philippine Star 03/16/2005

COTABATO CITY — It was "the wrath of Allah" — senablaw in the local dialect — that killed the 17 accused Abu Sayyaf terrorists who took fellow inmates hostage last Monday at the Metro Manila Rehabilitation Center (MMRC) in Bicutan in Taguig City, Islamic leaders in Central Mindanao said yesterday. "If you go astray and follow the path to wickedness, you will be punished," said a grand mufti (preacher) in a nearby North Cotabato town, who asked not to be named

.

Me: Yes, I've read about it. It is you, under a pseudonym or alternick.

God: I have so many aliases that people chose to call me not because of mp3.(multiple personality complex.)

Me: Swear, I have never thought of that. It just came to my mind that you have a lot of spokespersons who are doing more harm than good.

The Ca t

Monday, March 14, 2005

......

Dear mouse,

As I have written before, my phone does not ring anymore except for telemarketers.

Even my last friend is gone.

So I made kulit to a Friend UP there.

Me: I need to talk to You.

God: .............

Me: No, it is not about faith, not even calamity.

God: ...........

Me: I just want somebody to talk to.

God: ............

Me: Why do you allow sorrow ?

God: ............?

Me: Why...blah,blah,blah,blah?

God: ...........

Me: Why are you quiet ?

God: I thought you want to talk to me. So I let you talk.A friend can just be a listener you know.

Me: You mean, I am your friend and not a mere subject.

God: I have always been a Friend especially to those who think that they have no more friends.

Me: Thank you.

God : You’re welcome. As to your question, there is sorrow, so you will appreciate what happiness is like a night to day and black to white.

The Ca t

Sunday, March 13, 2005

"I'll be there"

Dear mouse,

Santa Maria, Sta. Barbara, hindi ko ako nagmumura. Doon ho ang lugar ng trial ni Michael Jackson. Kahit na weirdo siya, peborit ko pa rin yong song niya na I’ll be there.


By Michael Jackson

You and I must make a pact, we must bring salvation back

Where there is love, I'll be there

I'll reach out my hand to you, I'll have faith in all you do

Just call my name and I'll be there

Chorus:

And oh - I'll be there to comfort you,

Build my world of dreams around you, I'm so glad that I found you

I'll be there with a love that's strong

I'll be your strength, I'll keep holding on - yes I will, yes I will

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter

Togetherness, well that's all I'm after

Whenever you need me, I'll be there

I'll be there to protect you, with an unselfish love I respect you

Just call my name and I'll be there

(chorus)

If you should ever find someone new, I know he'd better be good to you

'Cos if he doesn't, I'll be there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah

I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there

(Just look over your shoulders, honey - ooh)

I'll be there, I'll be there, whenever you need me,
I'll be there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah

I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there...

Hindi ko ito theme song, dahil Rufina Patis ho ang theme song ko.

Narinig ko itong pinatugtog sa commercial ng mga golden songs of ek-ek at tamang tamang naghahanap ako ng isang kantang maipadadala sa aking kaibigan na feeling niya ay pinapasan na sa kaniya ang mundo at siya ay nag-iisa sa pagpasan. (Bakit naman kasi niya pinapasan. Sana pinagugulong na lang niya).

Pero ngayon, ayaw ko na siya. Hindi dahil kay Michael Jackson.

Dahil ito ang theme song ng nanay ng aking kaibigan na niloko ng kaniyang kalive-in.

Rewind: siya yong mader ng aking kaibigan na ninakawan ng kaniyang live-in lover sa ATM at ngayon pala ay may asawang penitition sa Pinas.

(Note: ang istoryang ito ay hatid ng Vicks Vaporub hindi para laitin ang sinuman kung hindi magbigay-aral)

Ring: Hellow, pick up the phone, Cath, I know you’re there. (yong anak po yan ng babaeng niloko)

Me: Yellow...’nong balita?

Ring: The Legal Wife called again. She said, “I’ll be there”.

Me: How come she was calling you?

Ring: It seems she could not reach the Husband.

Me: Ow.

Ring: I told my mom and we had a shouting match again.

My husband wrote them a letter telling them to leave pronto.

I told that to my mom too. She got to choose between me and her hunnie. That’s how she calls him. kakakilabot.

Me: Hmmmm if I may say something.

First, you ask your husbandry na cool lang siya. ‘Wag siyang makiaalam dahil this is your mother that he is asking to scram...

Second: Never,never,never ask somebody to choose between you and another party. Baka kahit lang sa inis, piliin niya yong mali.

Put your self in the shoes of your mother when she rejected your husbandry before you married him. Di ba pinapili ka rin. Di ba pinili mo rin ang husbandry mo?

Third: Whatever your mother has done, she is still your mother.

Ito ng sabihin mo. Hindi ko makakayanang makita kang niloloko (hina ka muna) (palamlamin ang mata) (tuloy)...ng lalaking iyan sa sarili ko pa namang pamamahay. Ano na lang ang sasabihin ng mga nakakaalam, na kinukunsinti ko ang kaniyang kalokohan. Mabuti sana kung malayo kayo at hindi ko nakikita.(kumpas ang kamay).

O diva, mas magandang pakinggan kaysa yong LUMAYAS kayo pero ganoon din ang ibig sabihin noon).

Then give a hint na open ka pa rin pag sakali siya’y mabagok na ang ulo at magising sa katotohananm , hind siya matatakot na bumalik at hindi lumakas ang loob ng bwakananginang lalaking yan

Ring: Sabi naman noong sister ko, alam naman daw ni ermatz na niloko siya. Pero bakit ganoon?

Me: Eh bakit si Kris binayaran daw ang utang ni Philip?

Yan pagkatapos ipagpalit siya sa ibang babae ha.Sagutin mo ako.

Huling balita:

Lumayas ang mader kasama ang labopherlayp.

Dumating na yong kumakanta ng “I’ll be there.

Abangan ang susunod na balita sa The BU....S...T.

yek.

The Ca t

Saturday, March 12, 2005

The Cassava Killer aka Balinghoy and the Casanova

Dear mouse,

One of my favorite snacks when I was a kid growing up in the middle of a big farm planted with cassava and sweet potatos was the linupak. This is a delicacy prepared from boiled cassava, sugar, grated coconut and sometimes mixed with banana(saba). This is mashed using the pestle and mortar.

Masarap.

Or my grandma would boil peeled and sliced cassava with brown sugar. We were warned however not to eat food made from cassavas if we do not know who prepared them.

I would see my grandma in the "batalan" with the newly-harvested cassavas sorting them what would be for our food, for the pig and for sale.

One time,I was so hungry that I did not bother to call my lolo(grandpa) to get me a snack.When my mom would visit my dad in the City, she would leave us to our grandparents who pampered us with lots of food from their farm and fishpens.

I went to the kitchen and found this glutinous stuff steaming hot from a big dish.

I tasted it. Uhhhhmmm, good but it was not sweetened. I thought, I would just add some milk and sugar.

My grandma came when I was scooping the stuff with a ladle.

She said: Gusto mo bang tumigas ang bituka mo?

My grandma was using cassava to make "almirol" of the mosquito nets.

Here in the Estet, the favorite "potlock food" is the cassava cake.

One time I chanced upon a lady who was selecting a few pieces of cassava from a box of these tubers.

I told her about the poisonous content of the cassavas.

She said with a grin, " I know that is why I am buying it to prepare a cassava cake for my husband's birthday. I am making extra. I know he would give some to his "querida".

Me: achecheche.

The threat to poison was just a joke by the lady but the querida thing is not.

Me: achecheche.

The Ca t

Friday, March 11, 2005

The Woman I admire (IWD)

Dear mouse,

International Women’s day last Tuesday at isang babae lang ang aking hinangaan. ME. Hindi po acronym, sa Tagalog po ay ako.

Aray, binatukan na naman ako.

Bago ninyo ako dusta-dustain na Presidente ako ng I love myself club, Pakinggan muna ninyo ako. Ang paborito ko pong kanta ay ang The Greatest Love of All.

Lalo po itong linyang ito... Give them a sense of pride to make it easier

Greatest Love of All

Whitney Houston

I believe the children are our are future

Teach them well and let them lead the way

Show them all the beauty they possess inside

Give them a sense of pride to make it easier

Let the children's laughter remind us how we used to be

Everybody searching for a hero

People need someone to look up to

I never found anyone who fulfilled my needs

A lonely place to be

So I learned to depend on me

I decided long ago, never to walk in anyone's shadows

If I fail, if I succeed

At least I'll live as I believe

No matter what they take from me

They can't take away my dignity

Because the greatest love of all

Is happening to me

I found the greatest love of all

Inside of me

The greatest love of all

Is easy to achieve

Learning to love yourself

It is the greatest love of all

And if by chance, that special place

That you've been dreaming of

Leads you to a lonely place

Find your strength in love

Isa ho sa naghubog sa akin upang mahalin ko ang sarili at magsumikap upang hindi sipasipain ay isang propesor (SLN). Unang araw ko po yong magturo sa isang universidad at ang aking kuwalipikasyon ay ang aking pagkapasa Sa SIPA (CPA) at tatlong taong pagtatrabaho sa industriya.

May meeting kaagad at siyempre balitaktakan ang mga senior faculty members. Tahimik lang ako. Nakikinig na kailangan daw ng mga bago na kumuha ng Teaching Methods para matuto kung paano magturo. Siniko ako ng isang lalaking propesor. Propesor ho talaga siya dahil katatapos lang niya ng kaniyang PhD sa USTe. Isa ko yan sa mga requirements para makuha ang titulong Full professor. (puno ho ang banga).

Sabi niya sa akin. Don’t be a nimcompoop. Say something. Sabi ko...SOMETHING. ( o di tumba siya).

Pagkatapos nang meeting ay inimbita niya akong maglunch. Bibigyan daw niya ako ng mga pointers.Uy magaling yon. Kasi ang pointer ko ay yong indoor antenna ng TV na hindi na namin ginagamit. Na-eextend siya.

Bait naman niya. Pero siya ang pinakamaraming kalaban sa college. Masyado kasing outspoken at rebelde.

Binulungan ako ng sekretarya sa opit. Sabi niya. Hoy, separado yan. Ang dinig ko operado. Sagot ko saan ?

Habang nginangata namin ang matigas na karneng baka sa canteen ay binibigyan niya ako ng mga dapat kung tandaan.

Isa dito ay ang aking pakikipaglaban para sa aking karapatan.Sabi niya, mag-aral ako ng masteral at pagnakatapos ako ay isampal sampal ko ang aking diploma sabay hingi ng promosyon. Hmmm. talagang matigas ang karne.

Kung hindi maghihintay pa ako ng promotion year na minsan ay ginagawa tuwing ikalawang taon. Hmmmm, sa susunod, isda ang aking oorderin.

Are you listening, tanong niya sa akin. Sabi ko oo, tito.

"Huwag mo akong tawaging tito. Sasampalin kita."

Ulkkk, marunong pala siyang tumawa.

Fast forward

Persistence makes exec achieve her life's to do list.

Ito po ang historya ng buhay ni Carolina Dominguez sa pakikipagsapalaran niya sa Amerika.

Dominguez says it was necessary to look the part as it was easy for minorities, particularly Asians like her, to be overlooked and passed over for promotions in a giant company like Citibank. "I had to learn how to fend for myself and to be aggressive. Over there, if you don't scream, you won't be heard. You have to demand a raise, demand a promotion. If you are going to be Asian and stayed in a corner, nothing will happen to you. I had to learn how to shout my achievements. It was tough," she says
.

Si Dominguez ay tapos ng kaniyang graduate studies sa 'Merika. Mayroon siyang panlaban, pero ani nga niya:

She sent applications to over 200 companies, got interviewed in 100, and got two to three job offers in Chicago, which she turned down.

Si Pusa ay gradweyt lang sa iskuwelahang munti sa Pinas. Pero sabi nga ni Dominguez, demand a raise, demand a promotion and that I did. One day pinuntahan ko yong Finance Director na puti at sabi ko, i am demanding a salary increase.

Tiningnan niya ako. Hindi ko makita sa mukha niya ang diploma niyang MBA sa UCLA.

Sabi niya, wala pa raw siyang basehan.Tokneneng.

Sabi ko di gumawa siya ng performance evaluation system at base doon, puwede nang madetermine kung magkano dapat ang mga pay increases sa merit system.

I can help.Yabang ko noh. Pero talaga namang kinukuha yan sa MBA. Bakit di niya lam.

After 3 months, natapos ang performance appraisal.

Lahat ng empleyado ay naincreasan ng suweldo. Maliit lang ang increase ko.Mababa ang ibinigay niya sa aking rating. Parang sinasabi niyang Asian ka lang, nagmamarunong ka.

Eh, no.

Mula noon, pinag-initan na niya ako.

Ano ang feeling ko.

Ibig sabihin noon, insecure lang siya. Beh.

Itutuloy

The Ca t

Invented Guilt Part 2

Dear mouse,

In my invented guilt part 1, it was a Catholic bishop who declared that it was God's wrath that killed the innocent children in Bohol.

Now it is a Malaysian minister who invoked God's vindictive Spirit to punish the enemies..

p>JAKARTA : Divine fury will rain down upon Indonesia and Malaysia if either side decides to use military force to solve a territorial row in the Sulawesi Sea off Borneo, Malaysia's foreign minister said Friday.

Malaysia and Indonesia will be forsaken by God if we think about using troops to threaten each other," Foreign Minister Syed Hamid Albar told reporters here.

So I dialed God's number. 1-800-CALL-GOD.

Ring: You've reached God's number. If you want to talk to St. Peter, press 1; if you want to talk to a prophet, press 2,(or better still, find a blog)hehehe; if you want to talk to GOD, press star...(hold while you are being transferred) you've reached God's number...if it is about war, press 1; if it is about calamity, press 2, if it is about food poisoning, press 3 and wait for the forensics department's number.

If this is the CA t, I have a message for you. Don't push your luck too far.

Grabeh.So I made kulit by using different aliases.hehehe again.

Ring: Yes, this is GOD,what can I do for you, Ca t? I know it's you. I have a caller id.

Ow, you do not have to tell me. I know what's in your mind. You will ask me if I am the God of the Moslems. Isn't it?

The Ca t: I have no doubt about that. Christians, Jews and Moslems portray you as God of Wrath. Sungit Ninyo naman.

Ring: That's what exists in the minds of many of my faithfuls because of the beliefs handed to them by people who propagated not about faith in Me but FEAR of me.

So they go to church because they are afraid that they go to hell, not because they would like to see me.

They do charities to please me not out of goodness that I put in their hearts.

They threaten people in my name. They declare war and run behind me. Some people.

Me: So what's you're doin'?

Ring: Ow, I watched them in their folly. They make their own destinies. I have seen terrible dictators who were afraid to meet their ends. They were brave when they were with the people that protected them. But they were cowards when they were about to meet their FATEs.

As to my church ministers...You know that not all those who call my name shall be saved.

BTW, I am also the GOD of the pagans... they worship my creation...Nature.

The Ca t

The Wiggle

Dear mouse,

I was fascinated by Manny Viloria's wiggle so I tried doing one in my photosoftware. For 2 consecutive nights, I tried producing one that wiggles. Nothing. I give up. I am sleepy, my back and fingers hurt.

Let me just stretch a little.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Magexercise tayo tuwing umaga, tuwing umaga, tuwing umaga.

Magexercise tayo tuwing umaga, tuwing umaga, tuwing umaga.

Para ang katawan ay sumigla.

Hmmmmmm I forgot the lyrics.

The Ca t

Thursday, March 10, 2005

Simply Stated...

Dear mouse,

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

When it can simply be stated, we got budget deficits too...

Ricciardone says US aid cut indicates nation is recovering

By DAVID CAGAHASTIAN

US Ambassador to the Philippines Francis Ricciardone said yesterday that the proposal of the administration of US President George W. Bush to cut US financial aid to the Philippines in 2006 by at least $20 million is an indication that the Philippines is on its way to being financially independent.

The Ca t

The Invented Guilt

Dear mouse,

Religion invented guilt.Offend the Supreme God and you will be cursed. Offend the Creator and you will be punished. He is a vindictive GOD. That is exactly what Bishop Christian Noel (what a name)conveyed in his statement regarding the poisoning and death of the children in Bohol.

The bishop believes the tragedy is a sign from God telling Catholics that if they go against the framework of the moral law and His commandments,” then something will happen to us.”

This Ca t has a direct line to the big boss.

So I texted Him.

Y did u kill dos inosent children? blah blah.

He did not text back, He left a message in my voice mail.

With the booming voice, He said:

What the h...are u talking about? Cassavas are poisonous. Am not guilty of the crime. If they are going to consult the CSI, they will be educated as to how cassava can turn into a deadly cyanide .

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I called back. His cell phone is engaged. Must be St. Peter, betting on the online cock derby so I left a message. "GOD is that you ? You sound like John Malkovich. Which CSI, Vegas, Miami or New York?"

The Ca t

Wednesday, March 09, 2005

Are bloggers journalists?

Dear mouse,

Hmmm, I wonder what other bloggers may think about this news.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Tue Mar 8, 8:14 AM ET

By Jessi Hempel

A California judge issued a preliminary ruling on Mar. 3 that three bloggers who published leaked information about an unreleased Apple (NasdaqNM:AAPL - News) product must divulge their confidential sources. If the ruling holds, it will set a precedent certain to reverberate through the blogosphere because this means under the law bloggers aren't considered journalists.

To crack down on internal leaks, Apple has taken legal action against three Web logs: PowerPage, Apple Insider, and ThinkSecret. The sites published information about an unreleased product, code-named Asteroid, that Apple considered a trade secret. According to court papers, the company says the people who run these sites aren't "legitimate members of the press," and therefore it has the right to subpoena information that will reveal which Apple employees are violating their confidentiality agreements. In most cases, journalists are protected under the First Amendment and don't have to reveal their sources. "BIZARRE AND DANGEROUS STANDARD"? The civil rights group Electronic Frontier F oundation, which represents two of the three sites under fire, says being able to ensure sources' confidentiality is critical to any journalist's ability to acquire information -- and that includes Web diarists, aka bloggers.

More...

picofcatfrom mycathatesyou hosted by photobucket.

The Ca t

Karinyo Brutal

Dear mouse,

This reminds me of two women, the wife of the former popular cager Fernandez and Melissa Martel,the abused wife of a scion of a mall magnate. No, this woman was not physically abused by the husband. It was the other way around.

03-07) 10:19 PST Oklahoma City (AP) -- The husband of a woman accused of shooting him in the head, beating him with a baseball bat and leaving him for dead says his wife is innocent. Now he wants her back — and out of prison.

William McDonald — who answered questions from The Oklahoman by e-mail because, he said, he still has trouble talking — is living in Florida. He wrote that his wife never beat him and he accidentally shot himself.

William McDonald claims he was wounded when he accidentally was shot because he startled awake, pulling sheets against the trigger of the gun that was in the couple's bed. McDonald claims he then grabbed the baseball bat and went to check for intruders, spreading blood throughout the house.

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"Who said that she has beaten me? Are they crazy?"

Picofthecat from catcollection. hosted at photobucket.com.

The Ca t

The CAT with one less life to live

Dear mouse,

Cats have nine lives. This one has used up one.

03-03) 19:26 PST Inkom, Idaho (AP) --

Hutchison was driving along Interstate 15 one day recently when a motorist kept trying to get her attention and pointing to the roof of her car. She said she was wary of the man, but wondered if perhaps her ski rack might have come loose.

She pulled over to the side, but kept her doors locked and the motor running.

The man pulled up behind her. Hutchinson rolled down her window to hear the man frantically shouting, "Your cat! Your cat!"

She had driven about 10 miles with the cat on top of the car, and didn't even notice the feline when she stopped for gas.

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Picofthecat from catcollection hosted at photobucket.com

That was a hell of a ride. Don't get her near me, or i'll scream.

The Ca t

Ninoy Aquino, Restless Spirit ?

Dear mouse,

MARKMOMUKHAMO WROTE:

In recent news, Ninoy is supposedly haunting government offices again:

Lawyer Cecile Villarin, who assists in the research work on the Aquino-Galman double murder case, recounted that on Feb. 22, she was working on her computer at the PAO in Diliman, Quezon City, on the transcript of records of Rebecca Quijano — also known as the Crying Lady — when she was surprised to find the words “To reach Senator Aquino” suddenly appear on the screen. Villarin told Tonight it was rather strange, pointing out she was in the process of copying and pasting another sentence when the phrase came up on the screen — and was repeated eight timesp/>

Now look at this, written way back in 1989 thru automatic writing.

See the explanation of automatic writing in this site.

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More...

The Ca t

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Chest Pain?

Dear mouse,

So your life is what you've dreamed even before you step out of the portal of the university...you got you career, money is no problem, your love life is abloom... then tragedy of tsunami proportion strikes.. you're down on your knees, you hit the rock bottom, you're paralyzed by your despair and crippled by sorrow.

There are times when nothing seems right. They call these trials,challenges, hard times, adversities, etc. etc.

Things get heavy for us to bear.

Today, I woke up feeling something heavy on my chest.



Kaya pala.



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Pic from amazingcatcollectionhostedbyphotobucket.

hekhekhek

The Ca t

Sunday, March 06, 2005

Dalit, awit

Dear mouse,

Isa pang klase ng tula ay ang dalit. Ayon sa mga makata na nagbubuhay ng tanaga, ito ay maikling tula na apat na talata at walong pantig (syllables).

Ito po ang aking dalit.

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isang hamak na delata,

punong-puno ng sustanya.

nilagay sa maleta.

pasalubong sa pamilya.


Tuwang-tuwa kong binigay,

Sa nanay kong minamahal.

Nguni't ang hindi ko alam,

Magiging sanhi ng away.



Pinalaman sa tinapay,

ginisa rin ng may gulay,

Sa gabi rin ay hapunan,

Sigaw ni tatay,tama na...sobra na.

Sandali mali. hindi magkatunog.

Puwede ba ang sardinas na lang.

Ang Sardinas

Bow

The Ca t

Talaga, Tanaga ?

Dear mouse,

Ngayon ko lang nalaman na kung may haiku ang Hapon, tayo naman ay may tanaga. Talaga po. Upang malaman

kung anong klaseng tula ito, pumunta dito.

Si Jardine Davies at ang kaniyang mga kaibigang makata ang nag-anyaya na buhayin ang ganitong tulang sa kanilang pakiramdam ay nawawala na.

Ito po ang tulang alay ko sa anak ni titorolly sa kaniyang kaarawan, gamit ang tanaga. Talaga po.

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munting anghel ka wari,

kaloob sa magulang.

pag-ibig na matindi

ang siyang dahilan.



Ang pagsulpot sa mundo,

ay hindi napigilan,

iyong amang nanggigil,

ina ay dinuhapang.



panggigil, di napigil,

isang gabing walang b’wan,

Saksi ay tikatik

ng bumuhos na ulan.



Ang laking tuwa nila,

Tila ba nagpiyesta,

Nang makita nila,

Sanggol na maganda.



Nang dahil sayo, tatay

ay naging mang-aawit.

Saiyong kunting ingit,

Siya ay bubunghalit.



karga karga, kanta ay,

Kahit walang boses, ay

Rock en roll at hip hop ay,

ginawa ring lulabay.



Tagapalit ng lampin,

Tagatimpla ng gatas,

Kahit gabing malalim,

Siya ay pupungas-pungas.



Napupuyat sa gabi,

Inaantok sa umaga,

Pati sa trabaho ay,

Namumungay ang mata.



Naging potograpo,

Nang ikaw ay lumalaki,

Panay kuha ng litrato,

Lalo pag ikaw ‘y ngumiti.



Habang lumalaki ka

Lalong napapamahal,

Mahal na daw ang gatas,

Pati ng mga laruan.



Libo libong di mabilang,

Nagastos mula pagsilang,

Kaya pag tinawag,

Anak naming mahal.



Maligayang pagsilang

sa mundong ibabaw,

Iyo ang birthday cake,

Kanino ang pulutan ?

The Ca t

Saturday, March 05, 2005

How to Memorize Numbers

Dear mouse,

Ring: Hello

Me: Hello, what number did I reach ?]

Ring: Tangee, number ko ito.

That was my former classmate. Oo nga pala, I wrote her number on a post- it note that looks like a miniature work of art because of the scribbles of numbers and letters,abstractlike.

Lots of numbers, that when I decided to transfer them in my directory, I could not remember whose's whose.

I was not kidding when I wrote that in one of my travels to the probins to make audit, I rode a wrong bus going to Manila.

It's because, I failed to memorize the bus number when I got off to stretch my legs, while the bus driver was taking his late dinner in that restaurant by the bus depot.

Believe me, it had a tremendous impact on me that I have to listen attentively to the greetings of the pilots announcing the flight numbers and destination before take off. Baka magsisigaw na naman akong ihinto ninyo ang eruplano...hindi ho ako pupunta sa... Baka pati eruplano mali ang nasakyan ko.hihihi

So I came up with the system that would help me remember numbers, especially if I was out there without pen to write them down,

O di ba minsan, you are attracted by some notices where telephone numbers are given. The problem is, you are in a moving vehicle and it is too late for you to fish a pen from your purse. Even if you have one, the problem may be a paper.

So here is the system that I devised for enbhancing memory to remember numbers.

1= lion

2= swan

3=monkey

4=chicken

5=duck

6=snail

7=giraffe

8=snake

9=bear

For this phone 345-7815 here is the picture that I made mentally in order to remember the numbers.

Monkey (3) with a frying pan is teasing a chicken.(4). The duck (5) is sliding from the giraffe's (7) while the snake(8) is hiding from the lion while waiting for the duck to fall.(5).

O kaya naman pag medyo may sumpong ako at galit ako sa mga Martians. (men for you) I think of numbers as the members of the opposite sex.

1 = is a straight guy.

2 = is a henpecked husband...nakaluhod eh.

3 = is the third kind...kulot siya at medyo tikwas.

4 = is the serious guy. nakakimbo palagi.

5 = cyclist= palaging nakabisikleta

6 = drinker = pot bellied na

7 = the gentleman. palaging nakasaludo.

8 = obese guy.doble bilbil.

9 = mayabang guy, malaki ang ulo.

Using the same number, I came up with this picture:

Si bading(3) making flirt kay serious guy (4)si cyclist(5) muntik nang mahagip si gentleman(7) pero natumbok si taba (8) kaya nagalit si straight guy at hinabol si cyclist na nakasuout ng skates.

The Ca t

The Absent-minded Professor

Dear mouse,

Why are professors absent-minded ?

Sa totoo lang, many of them are pre-occupied with other stuff that they forget what they are supposed to do---teach.

Some professors whose income generating activities come mainly from their per hour stint of talking to students are "making lagare" to several educational institutions.

"Making lagare" means teaching in different univesities as in making "lagare" sa shooting for popular and ever-in-demand movie stars.

In the academe, it is the professors, lecturers, instructors who are the stars. They are the divas, the spoiled brats who play with the fears and anxities of students and the visionaries who see from the start of the semesters if you are doomed or not.

Yes, Virginia, many of them are handling as many as 45 units per week...that's what they call Kalibre 45. That is nine hours a day of teaching. Oftentimes you will catch some of them mouthing marketing principles and practices when they ought to lecture on economic principles.

Some members of the academe believe that when you are a masteral, you can handle any subject under the sun. Kaya they accept subjects even if it is not their expertise except,Accounting, Law and engineering subjects.

Some call names of students who are not members of the class. (pabilib kasing alam nila ang istudyents nila)

Sus ginoo nasa kabilang bangir pala ng Recto.

I was once a member of the academe,I am proud to be one and I am proud to admit that I am absentminded... not because I had too much teaching loads and made lagare...at may kasamang martilyo...but they said that I got an overdose of anaesthesia when I had my major and minor ops.Kaya minsan may kausap ako kailangang tanungin ko kung sino siya after a few minutes talking. Hindi ko po kayo binobola.

At ano naman ang drama ng aking pagka-absent-minded?

You see, I was handling this evening class for my friend/ boss/professor while he was on sabbatical leave for a semester when I had that embarrassing moment that I thought I was in the wrong avocation.

To make the story short, as I was making pudpod my shoes walking to the hall that leads to the rows of classrooms, I was mentally calculating the benefit/cost analysis of handling that subject where the benefit was another brownie point from my boss and the cost was depriving myself of enjoyment after a day's work in my 9-5 job and some moonlighting jobs other than teaching.

I entered a room, murmured some good evening class, sat in my desk and looked for the classcards from my oversized bag. All the time, my pair of glasses was in its favorite place, multitasking as headband.

Then, I plucked it out from its nest, wiped it with kleenex and put it where it was supposed to be...my nose.

Sandali, I looked at the students. Ekkk bakit natransport ako sa "Back to the Future" movie set. Bakit tumanda ang aking mga istudyents. Gusto kong lapitan yong isa at pisil-pisilin yong mukha kong totoo ba yong wrinkles at tanungin kong saan nila dinala ang aking mga batang batang istudyents.

(FYI, I started teaching in my early twenties...a few years after graduation ). There may be students of mine who are a lot older than I was especially in evening classes but not in that class where all students were in their 40's or up. Paano na lang ako makakaterrorize, baka padapain ako noong mukhang lolo at sinturunin ako.

Yon pala, mali ang classroom na napasukan ko.

They were doctoral students whose room was temporarily transferred in that hall for more than a semester already.

I said sorry, wrong mistake.

Pero hindi pa grabeh yan kumpara sa experyens kung pagsakay sa bus na imbes pabalik sa MNL ay tumuloy na sa Legaspi.

Pero saka na yon.

"Ano kayo sinsuwerte?

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The Ca t

Friday, March 04, 2005

Memories light the corners of my mind

Dear mouse,

This is not about the song popularized by Barbara Streisand and adapted by Rico Puno with that infamous line...namamasyal pa sa Luneta ng walang peraaaaaaaa. That reminds me of my friend mimicking the singer.

This is a sequel to my blog yesterday about being absentminded.

And as I promised, I am going to give you tips on how to enhance your memory especially that part which you are losing because of certain factors. Age is one of them. Haaa hindi ko sinabing ulyanin ha. Makakalimutin.

O kaya SKAS. Si Kalimot AKO SYNDROME.

One such culprit that contributes to memory loss is the multi-tasking.

Sa mga matatanda, ito yong habang naliligo ka nga labhan mo tuloy yong mga pamunas...habang nagluluto ka nga, pakikisulsi yong pantalon.

I did that last Sunday. While watching The Buzz, I fixed the hemlines of my newly- bought-slacks...can't resist...sale kasi.... And at the same time, I boiled some potatoes.

Kumustahin ninyo ang nangyari. Ano kanyo ? Alin? Anong tinatanong ninyo. hakhakhak.

I got a toasted potato, a pair of pants with uneven hemlines, so uneven that you think one leg of mine shrunk.Not even my high cut boots could hide the irreperable damage. Tipid kasi magpaalter sa tailor. At least napanood ko ang The Buzz and I was able to remember how many times Rica Paraleja started her responses with Acshually...

A neuropsychologist suggested mnemonics to try remembering things especially in your to do list. This is the practise of forming a word using the first letter of each item.

Like, Garbage, laundry, Appointment, Dentist for your important sked the whole week that you do not want to forget or you will not be GLAD in case you miss one.

I am for it but sometimes, you can't remember what is the item that a letter stands for especially if you have a kilometric list.

Some people use ASSOCIATION like a a fly for garbage, water for laundry...etc.

But then it requires more memory bytes from your brain since there are more things to remember, the stuff itself and the associated word for it. It works well for a few items but never for more than ten items. If it will, it takes a while like fly for the garbage.... what if you cannot see one. O kaya this scenario, i know I have to remember something if I see a fly. I just can't remember.

This is the reason why information stored in the computer are called bytes or small pieces because just like our brain it can remember in small groups or items. This is what is termed by Dr. Francis Pirozzolo, a neuropychologist as chunking.

Grouping the fifty states into subgroups and applying mnemonics would be easier to remember them, like CATS, for California, Alabama,Texas and South Carolina; DOG, for Delaware,Ohio and Georgia...etc.

But this exercise requires basic information such as the names of the fifty states.

Me, I have a unique way of remembering groups of things, abstract and otherwise.

I start with a basic thing that I can associate that if I try to remember it, it would like be a chain, like a door for instance.

When I see a door, I should remember, my keys, lights, eyeglasses, or whatever things I do not want to forget bringing with me before I leave the house. So you say, it's the same, it still association. Yes, it is but I go more than that.

Like I try to imagine a picture. Weird. A door with eyesglasses,running after me dangling the keys while opening an umbrella.

O kaya when I go to the groceries, I think of a awimming pool where the eggplant is jumping from the board, joining the ampalaya and the rest of the vegetables.

A word of caution, if you fail to remember the veggie that jumps, do not ask the sales associate if a cabbage is a swimmer.

However there are things that you should not defer doing once you set your mind in it or you forget.

Yesterday, I saw the manager in my former workplace in the train. He approached me and kissed my cheek. Kabaro ko siya mga ateng. We share some beauty secrets, you know.

While implanting that kiss, he unceremoniously yanked the protruding price tag and label in my new cardigan, a task that I was trying to remember before I locked the door. He chuckled. Dahling, you haven't changed. You are a show off. You want to see others how much your suit costs.

Subtle na show off daw. Hindi noh,kasi taped over the original price is the 60 per cent reduced price.

Alibi ko lang yon for my poor memory.

So next time, before you leave, turn around in a full body length mirror. You may never know, baka may nakasabit na pusa sa likod ninyo.

When I was making turo sa unibersidad, I considered it a mortal sin if I cannot memorize the names of my istudyents. So guess what I did. I became a copycat to a former professor of mine who required us to submit an id photo that he attached to our classcard. I did more than that. I had a seatplan where I pasted their id photos so I can remember the faces of the names but only for a few weeks reference. To remember my isudyents, I looked for distinctive marks in their faces. Sa akin na lang yon ano...pero para sa mga makulit, ito... tinitingnan ko yong ilong, yong mata na parang palaging nagugulat o palaging antukin and I try to associate them with a favorite movie star of mine kaya minsan pag tumawag ako, pangalan na ng movie star ang gamit ko. Like.. Aga Muchlach, go to the board and solve problem one. Hindi ho siya kamukha ni Aga. Aga lang siyang dumating sa klase.

Itutuloy.

The Ca t

Thursday, March 03, 2005

Absentminded or your mind is absent?

Dear mouse,

I was writin'down a phone number when the phone rang.

Ring : Don't hung up, I got an important message...

Tanggalenok naman, automated telemarketer.

Now, where's the pen? You know, the pen I was using when the phone suddenly gave me a jolt.

Wala sa table, wala sa upuan, wala sa sahig at wala sa aking bulsa.

Tinamaan ng isang libong matsing na nagkahatsing-hatsing. Ano ba, saan ba kita inilagay.

So I went to my bathroom to have my ritual for the night. And there it is. Noooo, the pen was not transported magically to the toilet sink. It was in my hair.Nakaipit. When I am in the house, I put my hair up with a big clip. I found out that the nest-like mass of hair on top of my head can hold one bar of choc,or two markers, one red, one blue and two pairs of eyeglasses.

But this is not about hairy stories. This is about absentmindedness.

You see, when I picked up the phone, I forgot what I did with the pen. Does that happen to you too? Nangdamay pa.

I remember the story of a friend. Sa Tagalog po and pardon for the obscene language.

The lady who just got off from the bus was greeted by a concerned young man.

The young man :Ale, yong dibdib ninyo naka-expose.

The Ale: Ay salamat iho. Pu@#$%^&na naiwan ko sa bus yong baby kong pinasuso. Mama , hinto mo ang bus...

Opps saka ko na ituloy ang kwento, kasi Friday pala ngayon..ay Thursday pala. may appointment ako. Huwebes nga ba yon ? Ano nga bang appointment ko ? Matingnan ko nga ang kalendaryo. Sus ginoo, 2004 po pala ito.

Sandali maituloy nga ang niwawrite. Sandali nasaan ba ako. sa blogkadahan ba,pinay o sa choice. Definetely, hindi ako sa choicecat, tagaleg ako magsulat eh.

Next, tips for enhancing memory. Pag di ko nakalimutan.Makapaligo na nga. Sandali di ba naligo na ako.

Have a nice day folks.

Remember, ang hindi lumingon sa pinanggalingan, may nakakalimutan.

The Ca t

Wednesday, March 02, 2005

Are you a lefty ?

Dear mouse,

I am a lefty. No honey, I am not a communist. Ako pa.. na pinalaki at pinatanda sa cup-italism. Dapat pala southpaw dahil pusa ako pero I am not even a baseball enthusiast.

I am a lefthander. Translation. Kaliwete. Readers who are lefthanded too, raise your right hand. pretty please.

What ? Your parents forced you to write in your right hand when you were young? Tagoneknek naman.

Not with me. My momsy knew human anatomy and physiology, i.e. controlling functions for us left handed people are in our right side of the brain. She believed that forcing me to write with my right may confuse the messages sent to the brain to process. In short baka raw ako Malucrecia Kasilag (malokaloka.) Hindi nila alam naging Sisa na ako na ang tipong mga dayalog, nasaan si Basilio, Crispin huwag ka nang magtago sa guwardiya sibil....hahaha.

Ooops sandali. tuloy ang wento.

Old folks, however, have their own beliefs and superstitions that include among others, that left handed people are evil.

That is because right has always been associated with good. The thief who was promised paradise by Jesus Christ was on the Latter's right..At the end of the world. those who are asked to go to God’s right would receive salvation while those on the left, would be damned to suffer eternal fire. Judas Escariot was painted by Da Vinci to be seated at the left side of the Savior . And of course, the commies are also known as lefties or leftists.

My aunt was one of them. Whenever she paid us a visit, she would slap my hand when she saw me writing with my left. I was raised to respect the elders, so I obliged but the moment, she turned her back, I made faces as I switched from right to left. hahaha.Salbaheng bata me.

When I went to school, no one would like to be my seatmate. I took over the whole desk when I write. Para bang nabili o na ba yon although meron pa naman siyang one fourth ng desk. Masama pa ba yon ?

So my teacher would give me one desk at the back or one desk in front. Solo ko. That is kung merong sobrang upuan. Kung wala, pahinog ang katabi ko.

At a young age, I realized I was different from my classmates especially when I heard the comment. AY KALIWETE, to which I would retort with an one eyebrow raised..Eh ano ngayon ?

But Kaliwete has another connotation. It means unfaithful. Taksil sa pag-ibig.

So the remark, kaliwete ka pala ...should be ended with ...sa pagsulat or else, sasagutin ko siya ng sa lahat ng bagay, paghugas ...ng pinggan...kaliwete ako sa pagkain... the spoon in my left and the spork in my right...kaliwete rin akong sumapak ng tao pag sinabing kaliwete rin ako sa pag-ibig. Anong kaliwete ?

Kaliwa’t kanan kamo. Eykkk. Ibig hong sabihin, mas makanan siya o makaliwa, mamahalin ko pa rin siya. Pakipadala nga sa mail ng isa.

The Ca t

Tuesday, March 01, 2005

Ang Alamat ng NOW HWAT, CA T ?

Dear mouse,

Marami ang di nakakaalam kong bakit ang titulo ko ay NOW HWAT Ca t?.

Basahin po dito, pati na po ang mga story-not-telling-a-lie ng aming mga blogkada.

The Ca t

My Book

Dear mouse,

He smacked his lips." Why don't you-- er--get undressed?"

She looked at the man. This must be an earthling custom. She remembered the actress, Angie Dickenson who said "I dress for women and undress for men." Other than her beautiful red dress , she wore nothing underneath. Her body was exquisite.

The man stared at her lustily. "This must be my lucky night, honey and yours too." He tore off her clothes. It made him more horny. He was about to jump to bed with her when he saw the light on." Damn".

"Never mind", I will turn it off for you.

He looked at her arms as she reached out and her fingers turned into hairy paws as they touched the light switch.

In the dark, he screamed.

What ?

This is not one of my choicecat's stories.

Last Sunday, while watching the Oscars and wondering how many chandeliers can I make out of Beyonce's jewelry that night, I pulled a muscle. Under my arm. Bad body mechanics. So I cannot move without the pain.

But what has to do with the story above ?

Nothing, I am just trying to write a story about a Cat murderer.

pic by polo.

That's what.

Ngeek ngeeeeek

The Ca t